Walking Away and Giving Up Are Not the Same Thing

The distinction between the two

The start of 2020 for me began with getting a new job that I was super excited about. I thought I would finally be able to have a bit more stability and although it was a very basic job, I was ready to have more financial stability for the year ahead. The universe had a different idea for me though.

The job, unfortunately, left me overwhelmed, feeling awful about myself, and feeling like I didn’t want to wake up in the morning (as dramatic as that sounds). It didn’t suit me and it became super clear on the first day I worked there, that it wasn’t for me.

The part inside me that had decided it was going to be a great job was resisting this disappointing discovery. There was also a part of myself screaming, be a responsible adult and ‘suck it up’.

Long story short, I quit it, yes, after only one day. My misery and feeling awful about myself became too much and I threw my hands up in the air and decided to stop resisting. It wasn’t meant to be and didn’t suit me at all.

It wasn’t only that I viewed myself as not cut out for it, but also that I just didn’t want to do it. This is an important distinction too. I have always pushed myself to learn new things - no matter how difficult in the past. If I wanted to learn something or do something new I didn’t let my self-doubt stop me, but this job, I just didn’t want to learn or do.

Part of the key in deciding to walk away from something is to notice when you actually want to do something or not. I didn’t want to put all my effort into something I didn’t want to do.

Now I can see this disappointment for the blessing it was. I got to experience and do so much more with the rest of the year than I ever would have expected.

The point of this story is, I could have easily decided I was a failure and that I had given up on something, but instead, I decided I needed to walk away from a job that didn’t suit me. I needed to accept I didn’t want to make the effort.

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